JD's Birthday

Today is JD's birthday. We are celebrating the boys' birthdays in July this year with a combined party (LJ's is actually in August) for 2 reasons: 1) it's a lot easier (& cheaper) to plan 1 party than 2, and 2) LJ won't be jealous of just JD getting presents. So tonight, we're going out to eat at a family-friendly restaurant and for ice cream afterwards. LJ has already requested chocolate ice cream. And he thinks there should be cake, too. I am not making a cake 2 days before our trip! So we may have to find a cupcake somewhere; I think he has his mother's sweet tooth.
JD is probably the most cheerful, laidback child I have ever seen. LJ was like this until 18 months, so I keep reminding myself it's short term. Because JD DOES have a little temper. Today, LJ was sharing his "LUCAS"-lettered train with JD and gave him the yellow "U". Well, I would have thought JD didn't care which color or letter he got. Nope - he wanted the ORANGE "A", and he let all of us know!! He was so mad, it made me laugh. Sure enough, when LJ gave him the "A", he settled right back down.

I have to laugh at how opinionated and determined both of my boys are. For one, they got it from both of their parents. There is not much about Tim or myself that is low key, and Tim is even more Type A than I am. But I am so thankful that they show strong personalities, because I really believe for them to be good leaders, husbands, MEN, they need some of that. Many of my girlfriends are unmarried, and even Tim says it's because they are not enough men out there who are confident, know what they want, and go for it - they'd rather just go with the flow. But back to the boys, I relish that they already have opinions, and perseverence, and determination - I hope and pray they will always have that, and they will use it for the Lord.

So we leave for our trip in 2 days. 2 day drive up, 2 day drive back. About 5 days in-between. It may be a little crazy, but I'm so excited! I love road trips, and I think the boys will do really well; at least, LJ will. JD may get a little stir crazy (you know, the crawlers can't get around as much on the breaks). I can't wait to see my grandparents, and just hang out with the whole family. My cousin's wife is giving birth today (on JD's 1 year birthday!), so I hope we either get to meet the little one, or we don't completely miss the whole Boston clan of the Maugels as they visit with the first Brent Maugel grandchild! I haven't seen my brother since Christmas, so that will be fun to see him & his wife too; see all of their pictures of their new house, and what they've done to it.

Well, lots of packing to do! Or else we may start tripping over all of the clothes on the floor.

New face

I visited a blog earlier today and got inspired to change mine. This is in honor of our Cape Cod trip in 2 weeks. My uncle owns a house up there, and we are renting another to have my family reunion up there this year. Tim & I have never been to the northeast, and we are so excited! I am not excited we do not get to go together as a family, but that's a long and frustrating story; mostly, it has to do with the circumstances of his job. We had hoped to visit Boston while there, as Tim loves historical towns, but we will probably not make it this trip. I have not started much planning (you know, like all the planning I haven't done for Tim's birthday next week), so one of these days I'm going to have to start figuring out how to pack for me and the boys and fit my parents' luggage in too. And toys. And snacks. Yikes!

Okay, enough blogging for 2 days. I'm avoiding my grocery shopping and planning that I have to do. Can you tell??

Playing together

Okay, so how do you get the siblings to play together? I'm assuming right now that one day it just happens. As it is, JD climbs on LJ. LJ tries to get away. If unsuccessful, LJ pushes JD. Thankfully, LJ hasn't actually harmed JD, but of course it's upsetting to JD. JD just wants to play with his big brother. LJ doesn't want JD to touch anything of his, which is, you know, everything. I cannot wait till JD can walk! I'm hoping that improves JD's sense of playing with LJ. I get tired of trying to balance LJ's right and need to have SOME space to himself (and I'm not meaning a lot of time here) as he continues to adjust to this younger brother, and yet communicate to LJ at the same time that he will always have to share his stuff and play with JD even though he doesn't have to do it all day. I know the struggle will always be there. Siblings alternately love to play together and get tired of playing together. I have a brother. My mom used to have to time me playing boy stuff with him, and him playing girl stuff with me. It's also kind of funny because LJ needs some personal space. Often, he doesn't want me touching him; it's part of his sensory stuff. And JD has NO sense of personal space. He is constantly climbing on ALL of us all of the time! JD craves touch. LJ often runs from touch. There are days I am just stumped on what to think of it all. :)

So if anyone has any wisdom on the matter, feel free to share. I think God definitely created JD opposite to hopefully help let LJ know that touch is okay and welcome and not scary. But for now, it leaves me scratching my head in wonder!

Going Out

Tonight, I am going out with my 2 neighbor friends, Cyndi and Patricia. I am excited about a girl's night - I rarely get them. Or rather, it is very difficult to coordinate a night to go out. There is nothing I love more than going out to dinner with friends, enjoying the meal, enjoying the conversation (too bad I can't enjoy a cocktail!), and being carefree for a few moments. I don't think I ever turned down an invitation to go out when I was single. Cyndi, Patricia, and I are like the 3 musketeers of the neighborhood. We have walked down our streets with 3 strollers (yes, we take up the whole road) when our boys were small. Our children have played for hours and hours in our backyards, our driveways, our porches (well, their porches), at Chick-Fil-A, at Monkey Joe's......you name it. LJ & Connor are 2 days apart, William 5 months younger (but more daring than LJ & Connor put together! :) ). LJ has spent so much time with them, he shouts for joy every time he sees them. Now, he's telling me to call their mommies when he gets bored and wants to go outside. This approaching 3 years is amazing me as he spilling out all of these smart ideas!
So, on that note, I'd better get going and get my kids up. We are in dire need of going shopping this morning!

Parenting

Recently, my feelings got hurt. Now, I could most definitely blame some of it on hormones, there is plenty of that flowing through me right now. Most of you know me well enough to know it is rare to really hurt my feelings. My parents gave me pretty tough skin growing up; it helped me keep my focus on God if kids in school picked on me. Sometimes it surprises me the silly things I get upset about because they are usually very silly and very random. But this time, my child said a few things to show that he cared about someone. My friend focused on what he said at the beginning instead of his intention and his heart. I think the thing that disappointed me most was that my child's heart was to show he cared, which to most parents I would think, would be their proudest accomplishment. Children are, by nature, selfish. When they show unselfishness, it brings unspeakable joy to the parent. And it made me sad that LJ's heart was missed. Why do we, as adults, often criticize the one thing we disagree with, instead of looking at the heart and the intention of a person? I know I am the greatest of sinners at this, as the Apostle Paul would say! It reminds me that though I am opinionated about much, and there are many things I will not budge on in my beliefs and in how I raise my family, it does not give me the right to judge others and criticize how they do things; in fact, it is my calling to love them. In LJ's first year, I learned mothers have opinions about how to do everything for their kids, and they are quick to criticize those who don't do it like them. I have also learned, if only by nature of personality but also because God calls us and has created us to be different people, that we are going to do things differently and that is OKAY.
As I was searching my heart this morning and putting my cares before the Lord, I heard His Spirit say, in essence, that what matters in the end of this situation with LJ is that LJ's heart was right, and I should be encouraged that he is listening and watching and learning what I most desire him to learn. There are always going to be people in our lives who will misunderstand us, but if we are following God and doing the right thing (i.e., caring), then we can live without regret and stand before God with honor.

This Week's Musings

This week is going to be a fun week. Lots of playtime for LJ, lots of learning for me. We have LJ's 6 month evaluation of his sensory issues on Wednesday. Lately there are moments I think I must have been crazy to think he struggled with things. But then I remember the days. The long, long days of last year. Of dreading going places. And I rejoice. I was at church today, singing one of those praise songs with lots of "alleluias", thinking I truly feel that. I have seen what God has done in LJ in the last 4 months, and stand back amazed. He talks, he interacts, he initiates talking to other people. He looks people in the eye - he looked AT the camera today and smiled instead of frowning and looking at the floor! He's joyful, he's unafraid - I just don't even know when or how it happened. There are still a few moments here and there I see his "I need to escape" mode, but he communicates what he needs, and we deal with it. No tantrums (except the typical toddler "I WANT IT" :)!

Now, I still am curious as to what they will say as far as the school-type environment goes. Mother's morning out, preschool....how do I handle these decisions? He still does not enjoy singing songs, doing crafty things with a program, etc. As long as he is in control, he can handle it. Should I expose him to these things to help him adjust? Do I continue to protect his spirit right now and let him live in joy and this newfound freedom from fear? Where is the balance?
I can't wait to hear their perspective!

I was talking to a friend recently and we were talking about when God asks you to go there, on a step of faith, doing what is not rational or logical, following His call - whether location or deed or sacrifice, and she brought up Abraham and Isaac. God asked Abraham to sacrifice Isaac. I read the passage this morning in Genesis again - I have not read it in a long time. Abraham takes the tools, he takes his firstborn son, and basically says, "okay God, I'll do it". Now anyone that is a parent, and many who are not, would say NEVER. God, I can't do that!! I think the story symbolizes God's ownership and Lordship of us. (Our pastor was talking about John 10 this am and it talks about how the Shepherd owns His sheep.) If He owns all of it, then we are just stewards of it. Just like Adam was to be a steward of the garden of Eden, so we are to be stewards of our money, our relationships, anything God gives us (which is everything we have). But I tangent. This is related to what I was talking about several blogs ago. Sometimes God is just asking - can you give it up? Can you make a sacrifice? Do you TRUST ME? That I know what's best and I will never ask of you what is not a part of My will. Abraham surely passed the test of trust. Right before he sacrificed his beloved son, God provided a substitute offering. They named the alter "the Lord provides". God just wants to know if He has our whole heart. Undivided. That my heart is not given over to my flesh, my sin, the world, idols or my husband, my family, my friends, my house, my money, my stuff....that at the end of the day, I consider "better is one day in His courts than thousands elsewhere." And that I would give it all up to be with Him, honor Him, trust Him. When they call it a "leap of faith", I think they really mean it's like jumping off a cliff and having no idea if you will land safely at all. I can testify He has caught me every time I have trusted Him first. I can also testify that I cannot go any deeper in my relationship with Him when I am holding onto things in my life, that I am held back from experiencing this full life He wants to give me until I give it up to Him. (John 10 - Jesus says, "I have come that they may have life and have it to the full.")