My Refuge

"In every walk with nature, one receives far more than he seeks."  ~ John Muir

 

 

Full disclosure: I am not really a nature girl.  I think it started with the girl and ended with the allergies. I was taking Benedryl every 4 hours by 8 years old to survive ragweed season.  The southern doctors tell me it is stronger in the North (where I grew up), which explains why I quickly shifted to all the greenery in the South (that was not in the north). Claritin did not exist, or was not approved for children, to the best of my knowledge.  August and September were not fun.  The only way for me to survive was to stay inside with windows closed, preferably air conditioning (although in Michigan, I remember open windows and fans, not AC), and a good book.   So the outdoors and I had a tenuous relationship at best. 

But then, God gave me this journey. This beautiful, hard journey of parenting. Parenting with special needs. And I learned, after years of drowning, I needed a refuge. A place that was respite from the weariness and stress and a place I could shut out the noise of the world.  We moved last year, and this (below) has become that refuge, that respite place for me.  I wasn't really planning on it, but amazingly enough, the kids do not interrupt me on the screened porch often. God and I meet in the mornings, with my coffee in hand.  It is 95 degrees out lately, so for now, it is ICED coffee.  The squirrels rustle the leaves. The birds sing.  At night, I read, or in this case, blog.  The crickets chirp. The frogs ribbit. The grasshoppers sing. And God gives me peace here. It is quiet. There is room for rawness and reflection and confession and healing.  I think that is the part John Muir was talking about above. God gives us more than we seek. I am thankful.

"Have mercy on my, my God, have mercy on me, for in you I take refuge.  I will take refuge in the shadow of your wings until the disaster has passed."  Psalm 57:1