An Update

It has been 2 years.  Two years since my last post.  In re-reading my last post, it was very much the beginning of a time to blossom.  LJ is healthier than he has ever been.  He started playing Fortnite just before his 13th birthday and now is a very proficient...Fortnite dancer.  My son, who ran to his room and shut the door during his 3rd or 4th birthday (or both?), is now dancing with his friends in the hallway...or with Teens at church.  Sometimes I wonder if there was an alien invasion, but then we have the occasional reminder that I still have the same son.  But now he is fun and funny.  

I am still baffled that I can say these things.

The kids all have a social schedule that is far busier than mine.  We have families in the neighborhood who homeschool, and now not only do we have the 4 boys 2 doors down, but we have 3 girls across the street, much to my girls' delight!  Another family who joined our homeschool co-op this year moves in later this year and their kids are in my boys' classes.  They have also made new friends through various outlets.  The blessings in these friendships has not gone unnoticed after having a long season of isolation.  The younger kids struggled when we couldn't go places or had to leave early because of LJ's behavior or seizures.  Sometimes, I just did not have the energy to power through it all. I feel like people give me odd looks now when I laugh about LJ's talking back (usually he is just making a smart-aleck remark) or when I bend over backwards to make sure they get time with their friends or when I am amazed at LJ doing his schoolwork with excellence (yet lots of complaining).  I often think, "if only they had seen the dark days."  My heart is full from doing all the "normal" things I wasn't sure we would ever be able to do.    

The joy I see on my son's face - on all of my children's faces - 

is something I knew I wasn't promised on this side of heaven 

and I wasn't sure we would see.  

The gift that it is overflows my heart. It may not last.  

So for today, I hold it in my heart and choose thanksgiving.

Eucharisteo.